How to Find a Marriage Counselor

Understanding licensure types

When searching for a couples therapist, you will encounter several license abbreviations. Here is what they mean and how they relate to couples work:

LMFT — Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

LMFTs are trained with a specific focus on relationships and family systems. Their graduate education and supervised clinical hours emphasize couples and family dynamics, making them particularly well-suited for marriage counseling and couples therapy. In many states, LMFT is the most common credential for therapists who specialize specifically in couples work.

LCSW — Licensed Clinical Social Worker

LCSWs hold a Master of Social Work (MSW) degree and have completed clinical supervision requirements. Many LCSWs specialize in couples work, particularly with additional training in approaches like Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) or the Gottman Method. They are fully qualified to provide couples therapy in all states.

LPC / LPCC — Licensed Professional Counselor

Licensed Professional Counselors (the title varies slightly by state — LPC, LPCC, LCPC, LAC) hold master's degrees in counseling and are licensed to provide mental health therapy including couples counseling. Many specialize in couples work with additional training.

PhD / PsyD — Licensed Psychologist

Psychologists hold doctoral degrees in psychology and are licensed to provide assessment and therapy. Some specialize in couples work. They typically charge the highest rates and may be more available in academic or research-oriented settings.

Where to search for a therapist

Psychology Today's therapist directory

PsychologyToday.com/us/therapists is one of the most comprehensive therapist directories in the United States. You can filter by location, specialty (couples counseling, marriage counseling), insurance accepted, sliding scale availability, and therapy modality. Most therapist profiles include a photo, description of their approach, and a contact form.

Gottman Referral Network

GottmanReferralNetwork.com connects clients with therapists who have completed training in the Gottman Method — one of the most research-supported approaches for couples. Searching here ensures you find therapists with verified specialized training.

AAMFT Therapist Locator

The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) maintains a therapist locator at therapistlocator.net. All listed therapists are AAMFT members — many are LMFTs with substantial couples-focused training.

Your insurance directory

If you plan to use insurance, search your insurer's in-network provider directory specifically filtering for therapists who list couples therapy or marriage counseling as a specialty. Call to verify both that they accept your insurance and that they currently have availability.

Questions to ask in a first consultation

Most therapists offer a free 15- to 20-minute phone consultation before you commit to scheduling. Use it. The questions that matter most:

• "What is your specific training in couples therapy?" — Look for mentions of EFT, Gottman Method, PACT, or other recognized couples-specific training, not just general therapy experience.
• "What percentage of your practice is couples versus individual therapy?" — A therapist whose practice is primarily couples-focused has built more experience with the specific dynamics of relationship work.
• "How do you typically structure sessions? Do you see both partners together, separately, or both?" — Different therapists have different approaches; knowing theirs helps you evaluate fit.
• "What does progress typically look like after 8 to 12 sessions?" — A thoughtful therapist should be able to describe what the early stages of improvement look like without making guarantees.
• "What is your approach when one partner wants to work on the relationship and the other is uncertain?" — This is a common reality and worth knowing how they handle it.

Red flags to avoid

• A therapist who sides clearly with one partner in early sessions. Good couples therapists maintain a systemic view and avoid allying with one party.
• A therapist who recommends separation or divorce early in the process. That determination belongs to the couple, not the therapist.
• Lack of specific couples training or an inability to name their therapeutic approach. "I use common sense" is not a training background.
• No clear structure or stated goals for therapy. Effective couples therapy is generally goal-directed, not open-ended indefinitely.
• Seeing each partner individually without clear agreement about confidentiality. Individual secrets shared in separate sessions can create conflicts of interest that undermine the couples work.
• Pressure to commit to a long package of sessions upfront. Reputable therapists do not require large pre-payment commitments.

What if only one partner is willing to go?

This is more common than people expect. One partner can attend couples therapy alone — it is sometimes called "one-person relationship therapy" or "discernment counseling" when separation is being considered. Research suggests that even one willing partner engaging with a therapist can produce meaningful changes in relationship dynamics. If your partner is reluctant, that does not have to be the end of the possibility.